Immortals - Directed by Tarsem Singh

An epic action from the producers of 300...?

A few years ago I was watching a movie at the cinema and a woman a couple of rows ahead of me gasped at her friend, "Oh! I really love movies about ancient Egypt!" She didn't realise that she was just watching a Dolby Digital surround sound ad. When it dawned on her she sounded terribly disappointed, "Oh... It's just an ad..." I felt for her. I too am a great fan of the "ancient historical fantasy" film genre. 300 is one of my favourite movies. It is an awesome and epic retelling of the ancient story of King Leonidas and his 300 Spartan soldiers. Immortals though, was to me as disappointing as that Dolby ad.

It might be slightly unfair of me to compare the films, but as it's been so blatantly advertised "by the producers of 300" I optimistically assumed that it could have potential. Too bad they didn't get Zack Snyder back to direct or Frank Miller to tighten up the script, or a myriad other elements that would have seen it earn somewhat of it's inflated promotional budget.

I do love Mickey Rourke these days as the bad guy. His face is grotesquely interesting and he has a voice that could squash puppies, but even this did not make up for the many other weak characters. If somebody is going to beat the hell out of scores of scantily clad Greek men, they should do it with a kind of mad human desire for vengeance. Something the audience can relate to! Henry Cavill is cast as Theseus, the mortal chosen by Zeus to lead an army against the ruthless King Hyperion (Rourke). Cavill struggles sorely with the sort of balance a character like Theseus requires to elicit empathy while still seeming vicious enough to carry out mass slayings. It is almost comical to watch this soft faced boy go into a rage and start hacking into the men around him.

I will say that many of the fighting sequences were entertaining and the costumes and sets were quite beautiful, but Immortals was completely devoid of that feeling of intimacy which was established in 300 through the cinematography. Many of the camera angles were jarring and there were barely any close interactions with the characters which would have helped them seem tangible and empathetic. In 300 I knew how much each character was worth and I was moved when they failed or died or won. Immortals made me feel nothing.

With 300 being made for at least 10 million dollars less than Immortals, the producers might want to think next time about spending the extra cash on getting the scripting, direction, actors and cinematography right.

Immortals gets 2 out of 5 stars from me.

With Love

Surgeon Bug